How easy is it for you and your significant other to share a bed? It probably depends on a lot on your sleeping styles. Sleeping together as a couple can be a really lovely, cute bonding time, or it can be some terrible night long sweaty fight for pillows. Seriously, it can bring out the worst in you — I will suffocate someone for the duvet on a December night. Luckily, for most couples it’s a nice mix of intimate cuddling with only some of the time. But while there’s a lot of talk about couples’ sleeping habits or what your sleeping position says about you on the internet, there’s a whole lot more to sleeping with someone than deciding whether you’re sleeping in the nook or back to back.
Sleeping together is not all romance. Sleeping together is snoring and sleep farts and drooling. Sound gross? It is. But at some point you’re so comfortable with someone that you’re OK with it. You sort of have to be, because you’re just as gross. I don’t care how much of a demure little lady you pretend to be during the day, when you’re asleep it all hangs out.
So beyond being wrapped up together like pretzels, here are six weird couple sleeping habits that are actually completely normal:
1. Talking… Sense and Nonsense
I once had a roommate that could have an entire conversation in half sleep mode, none of which she would remember the next day. While we would have completely normal conversations in her sleep, sleep talking can also be hilarious, as one woman who recorded her boyfriend’s sleep talk found out: “Oompa loompas don’t sing in heaven. They tidy up the clouds.” If you or your partner are sleep talkers, it’s going to be a normal part of your relationship.
2. Dangerous Cuddling
I’m sure I’m not the only one who who has ended up in a total death grip in the middle of the night. Sometimes your half-awake partner moves into a weird cuddle position that’s supposed to be cute but actually is horribly uncomfortable and awkward. But, as long as it’s not depriving you of oxygen (I used to hook up with a guy who would roll over on top of me in his sleep, not in a adorable, cuddly way, but in a completely crushing way), we sort of let them do it.
3. Farting Like No One’s Watching
Yeah, it’s not all romance and butterflies. Being in a sleep-over level relationships basically means listening to each other fart through the night. Gross? Well everyone does it. Everyone. According to US News and World Report, “healthy people pass gas10 to 22 times each day”, and that’s not just the guys that are smelling it up, as “men and women pass gas about the same number of times each day”. And women actually have smellier farts. Gas is caused by the air we swallow and the bacteria in our gut, and that bacteria is still at work while we sleep so the farting continues, and we just put up with it. That’s love.
4. Putting Up With Bodily Fluids
There is drool. There is snot. There is sweat. There is maybe a pile of fun from one of you earlier in the evening. Depending on your particular level of cleanliness, you may or may not end up sleeping in some of these things. It happens.
5. Not Sleeping Together
It would be wrong to assume all couples sleep together. While going to sleep at different times, using tablets and waking each other up, is a modern relationship plague, some couples have chosen to sleep separately and not disturb each other. And it doesn’t necessarily hurt the relationships, as Lisa Freedman points out, it helps, as “we’re a lot nicer to each other — and other people — when we’re well rested”. There are other ways not sleeping together, or depriving yourself of sleep works for certain couples. One woman explains how getting up at 5:30 when her significant other gets up to have coffee and breakfast together every morning is important relationship bonding time. Getting up at 5:30 a.m. when you don’t have to is maybe the weirdest thing I’ve heard, but whatever works for you.
6. Disturbing Each Other’s Beauty Sleep
So, just as you’ll keep your loving partner from having any of the precious blanket, you may very will disturb their sleep for your own. Maybe this is just me being super crafty (and mean), but if I’m in bed with some who’s snoring is keeping me awake at 3 a.m. I’ll shake them awake and then quickly pretend to be asleep, so I can get a respite from the snoring. It may be a cruel and unusual thing to do to someone you care about, but sometimes it’s the only option.
Originally posted on Bustle