In Defense of Quickies, Because Short Sex Doesn’t Mean Bad Sex

A lot of the best sex tips that you hear require not only an open mind, but a whole lot of time aka making sex last longer. Devoting huge periods to foreplay, trying new positions, talking about things you’d like to explore with your partner. Even the raunchier stuff has a bit of a ‘light candles and stay in for the night’ vibe. And for good reason— if you want stronger orgasms (or longer ones) then sometimes your best bet is to put some time in and really take your time with clitoral stimulation and more. I really believe that.

But that’s not always an option — and sometimes you’re just ready to go. Sometimes you’re horny in the morning and only have 20 minutes before work. Sometimes you’re staying with family and you only have a certain amount of time alone. And sometimes you just really want to try doing it in the changing room at the mall because, ADVENTURE.

There are lots of times where you’re pressed for time, but you don’t need to write off sex all together if you embrace the quickie. Because sometimes you just need to go for it. Some people don’t like them because they seem rough or impersonal or a bit unsatisfying, but I disagree. You should never do anything you’re not comfortable with, but if you embrace quickies as just a different kind of sex, you may enjoy them in a different way.

Let’s clear up some misconceptions, here are some reasons quickies deserve some love:

1. Short Doesn’t Mean Bad

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Yes, we’ve all had short sex that has been disappointing, but it doesn’t have to be. Ripping each other’s clothes off as fast as you can (or leaving most of them on and just going for it), is really sexy once in a while if you let yourself get carried away in the moment. Some of the most fun sex I’ve ever had was a quickie on the kitchen floor that couldn’t have lasted more than 10 minutes. It. Was. Amazing.

2. Some People Get TOO Sensitive With Time

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While a lot of men worry that they don’t last lot enough, you’d be amazed how many women prefer their sex to be a bit shorter. Because sometimes sex that goes on too long leads your clitoris to be too sensitive or even just to general soreness. You’d be surprised how many women are relieved to have a quickie, as long as it’s done right.

3. Location Often Dictates It

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Like I said, sometimes you want to have sex somewhere different, and going at it in an airplane bathroom can’t exactly be a two-hour long romance-a-thon. If you’re driven by excitement and the need to try new things, a quickie is going to be your solution.

4. Orgasms Aren’t The Be All And End All

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Passion is. Yes, I am all for orgasm equality and hate the myth that the female orgasm is somehow this elusive mystery we’re all chasing with a broken net. BUT I also don’t think it has to be the main and only goal of every sexual encounter. Yeah, if you have a quickie maybe you’re not going to get off, maybe you’re going to get interrupted or chicken out halfway through. Who cares? It’s fun and you can always finish at home.

5. It Forces You To Get Creative

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Who knew you could reach her clitoris from that angle? Or that you could have sex standing up if one of you wrap your arms around his neck and jump first? If you have limited time and space you can learn things you didn’t know before, then incorporate them into your sex life more generally.

6. It’s A Great Way To Rekindle A Spark

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Sometimes if you feel like your sex life is getting monotonous, you need to add something unexpected to get it going again. A quickie is the ultimate unexpected— you decide to have sex because you just can’t keep your hands off of each other, even if that time and place aren’t the best. A reminder of just how much you turn each other on is never a bad thing.

Originally posted on Bustle