Different sex positions may be your favorite for different reasons — one of them is probably a favorite because it’s an old standby. It’s part of your normal repertoire. But there are other positions that people consider their favorite sex positions for exactly the opposite reason: they’re not something that they do all the time, and the fact that they’re only occasional moves — and often difficult — makes them all the more sexy.
Standing up is definitely one of those kinds of sex positions. You might be scared to try it because it’s just downright tricky, but there are ways to make it easier. “Standing positions are usually for rear entry or bent over a couch or the edge of the bed,” Sarah Watson, LPC and Sex Therapist, tells Bustle. Most women feel a bit more supported when they are able to lean against something so the fear of falling over or being dropped is lessened.”
So you don’t need to worry about falling on your face. Although, as long as nobody gets hurt, some stumbles and mishaps are part of what makes this kind of sex fun. You just need to try and try again. You’ll get the hang of it, and when you do, it’s totally worth it.
So here are seven tips for sex standing up, because the shower is not always your friend, but the wall may be.
1. Ease In With Only One Of You Standing Up
Positions like this, The Butterfly, only involve one partner standing. If you’re not used to thrusting away while standing up— trust me, the center of gravity is different — try getting more comfortable with a position like this rather than jumping right into it. Once you’re stable, you’ll feel better trying a position where you’re both standing.
2. Lean On Something
As Watson explains, a lot of women feel more comfortable if they have a little support. Although, if you’ve watched enough porn you’ve probably seen women being thrown around like they’re all really horny professional gymnasts, but that’s just not realistic. Use a wall, lean against a table, a couch — whatever you can to give yourself some support.
3. Go Three Legged
Three-legged Dog is a way more advanced sex position, but when you’re ready, it can be really fun. Facing each other, but with one of your legs hiked up and resting on your partner’s for support, you’ll have to really grip onto each other, making it an intimate and exciting position.
4. Don’t Be Scared Of Props
If your heights don’t match up, they just don’t and you can’t force it. Don’t be scared to stand on books, a couch, or kneel on a chair — anything that will give you that extra couple of inches.
5. Avoid Showers If You’re New To Standing Up
I’m sorry, I’m sure some people swear by shower sex, but it’s definitely a more advanced move. Standing up sex can be difficult enough when you’re trying to find your balance, and doing all of it in a slippery shower is even tougher and just a bit dangerous. Proceed with caution if you take it to the shower.
6. Try Forward And Backward
While some positions like the Three-legged Dog are face-to-face, standing up can be a lot easier from behind. You can really brace yourself that way, especially if you stand a little further away from the wall and lean forward to ground yourself. But it all depends on your heights, so don’t be scared to try it a few different ways and do what works for you.
7. You Don’t Have To Focus On It As The Main Event
It’s a super fun way to mix things up — and have sex in rooms you might not normally have sex in — but it’s obviously tricky. It’s better to give it a go a few different times then try to force it to work for 20 minutes and tire yourself out. And this is true of any new or difficult position. Play. Have fun. Enjoy it. Don’t break your back and try to make it work. It’ll be a little easier next time.
Originally posted on Bustle