When it comes to the best sex positions, a lot will depend on your relationship to the person you’re having sex with. If you’re having a fling, or a relationship just based off of sex, experimentation will likely happen. And in the early stages of a relationship, you’re having sex somewhere in between I-can’t-keep-my-hands-off-of-you and you-give-my-heart-a-boner-so-I’m-probably-going-to-look-into-your-eyes-a-lot. Long-term relationship sex is a lot more confusing. You know each other well at this point, but you may want to mix it up while still maintaining some level of intimacy. How do you do it?
Well, the first step is always to talk to your partner. The best sex happens through great communication — before, during, and after. Find out how they’re feeling, whether they really want to mix it up or just maybe adjust a few things. There may even be an old standby you’ve forgotten about. I’m totally about incorporating new things into your repertoire, but if you’re going to try anything far off of your shared beaten path, make sure to, you know, talk to them beforehand. Not all surprises are fun.
But once you have an idea of what might be fun for you and your partner, here are some positions to try that are great when you’re in a long-term relationship. (And keep in mind that these positions work with two women as well!)
1. Sitting In A Chair
How To Do It: Well, pretty straightforwardly, you’re going to use a chair (although sub in a couch or other furniture if you need). While your partner sits on it, straddle them and guide them inside of you. Depending on the height of the chair and if your feet or just theirs can touch the floor, take turns grinding or bouncing.
Why It’s LTR-Approved: Sometimes, you just need to mix something up without going full wheelbarrow or the like. This allows you a whole new perspective — and probably sex in a new room, which is always a favorite for me — while still being an intense, intimate position. And bonus points having furniture to brace yourself with.
2. The Butterfly
How To Do It: You lie down and lift your ankles toward their shoulders, then with their hands on your hips, both of you raise your hips a few inches off the bed. (Or if this is too hard, use a pillow underneath you!)
Why It’s LTR-Approved: There’s the opportunity for really deep penetration, and you’re doing something a bit crazy and precarious, but with the safety of the bed involved. So it’s wild, but not too wild. Plus, you get an amazing view of each other, so you can really appreciate your partner.
How To Do It: You know what to do. It’s the best cuddle position, and then — remembering lube is your friend— you guide them inside you from behind while lifting your top leg up a bit. You may need to move your body up or down to get the alignment right. And don’t be stingy with the lube, really. The tight squeeze feels great, but can be frustrating to get right.
Why It’s LTR-Approved: There’s the comfort of your favorite cuddle position, it’s hugely intimate and they can sexily whisper in your ear things dirty or as loving and cheesy as you want, meaning this position can be a lot of different things. Plus there’s G-spot access and both of your hands are free for clit play, so whatever stimulation you need is there. Also, if you’ve been together ages, is there any problem with a position where you can both just lie the eff down?
4. Reverse Cowgirl
How To Do It: Carefully, for one. Your favorite cowgirl position, but you’re facing away from them, bracing your weight on your hands. This is the position that is most likely to cause injury, so be careful.
Why It’s LTR-Approved: If you want to inject a little strange back into your sex life, this is how. You’re going for it without seeing each other’s faces, making it really raw and animalistic — plus they have a great view of your butt. Get both of your blood pumping again.
5. Coital Alignment Technique
How To Do It: It’s like missionary, but you hike your legs up around them, and their body is pitched more forward. Unlike missionary, the focus is way more on grinding.
Why It’s LTR-Approved: There’s bound to be a lot of missionary happening already if you’re in a hetero relationship, but the grinding aspect of this position means lots ofclit stimulation. You know each other really well, so let’s focus on getting you need, right?
6. Modified Doggy
How To Do It: It’s what happens when you collapse onto your forearms during doggy, so you can lie down and they can climb up. You may find a pillow under your hips helps get the alignment just right.
Why It’s LTR-Approved: Many people love doggy, but this gives all of the same intensity with less of the slamming. You’ve got great G-spot access and one of you can still reach your clit, so it can be a really intense orgasm for you and a really tight fit for them.
7. Woman On Top
How To Do It: Imagine yourself as Beyoncé.
Why It’s LTR-Approved: Being on top makes you feel confident and sexy AF. I like this particular variation because you still have close face-to-face contact. Try moving around and resting your hands in different ways until you find the variation that’s perfect for you. Your partner will love watching you do it and you’ll feel effing incredible.
Originally posted on Bustle