When it comes to trying new sex positions, sometimes you don’t do them out of laziness or because you’re so caught up in the moment. Sometimes, you’re just a bit freaked out by trying a new position. Maybe it’s because you’ve never tried it or maybe you’ve tried it and it’s gone badly, but there are some positions that can seem a little scary.
The weird thing is, not everyone is scared of the same ones. I know some women who love getting on top and others who are completely petrified of it because, well, “What do I do with my arms?”. And honestly, that’s a question I’m still not great at answering. Maybe the hand jive? But it is seriously important to remember that some people just get mental blocks about certain positions or sex acts, which means they end up missing out on a lot of fun in the long run. And I’m not talking about dangling from a sex swing covered in hot sauce while being dressed like a panda bear, I’m talking about some pretty basic stuff.
So there’s nothing in this list that you would actually need to be afraid of — it’s just about trying them and getting over your preconceptions. Here are seven positions that you should stop being afraid of, because one of them just might end up being your favorite:
1. Reverse Cowgirl
How To Do It: Be careful, because this is a position where injuries happen. Just like cowgirl, except facing their feet, you straddle them and then lower yourself down. You can tilt slightly forward or back, using your hands to brace yourself either way.
Why You Shouldn’t Be Scared: Because even though you’re facing away from your partner, you can still be connected to your them — just talk to each other. Plus, they’re getting an amazing view and you get to feel like an independent sex goddess.
2. Crab Walk
How To Do It: Just like gym class, you both get into the crab position. Unlike gym class, you scuttle over and lower down onto your partner. If you’re flexible enough you can put one leg and then the other on their shoulder. Get ready to grind, away and don’t expect much pumping — but the clit access and unusual position makes it worth it.
Why You Shouldn’t Be Scared: Because once you get into it, it’s actually a really relaxed position. Lube will be your friend. And it’s a really unusual position which will bond you and keep you connected.
How To Do It: Get on all fours while your partner moves behind you, entering you from the back. You can spread your legs more or less to make you both comfortable and even stick a pillow under your knees or wrists if you need more cushioning.
Why You Shouldn’t Be Scared: Some women don’t like doggy because they think it’s too intense or impersonal. But you can totally take control and slow the whole thing down. Then you can get the deep penetration and clit play without it being too intense. Win-win.
How To Do It: Easy. One of you sits on the edge of the bed or couch and the other sits in a comfortable position on the floor. It’s great for oral sex, but don’t be scared of adding in fingers or toys as well.
Why You Shouldn’t Be Scared: Some people feel a bit exposed in this position or anytime it’s all about oral sex, but you have to remember that your partner is loving it. This position means you both can relax and you can zone out in your own little world and really enjoy. The fact that there are endless mind-blowing combinations in this position certainly doesn’t hurt.
How To Do It: Your partner sits cross-legged — putting a pillow underneath if there’s any back or hip pain. You gently sit on top of them, wrapping your legs and arms around your partner. It may be an awkward fit at first, so be generous with the lube if you need it.
Why You Shouldn’t Be Scared: Because it’s difficult to get into and you don’t do very much in the position, you might be scared of just being in it and staying still — don’t. It’s a great break from more vigorous positions, you’re close enough for clit stimulation, dirty talk, or just straight up chilling. It may be more intimate than you’re used to, but in the best way.
How To Do It: Spread your legs so you’re comfortable (if your heights are really different, one of you may need to stand on something). Your partner should hold your hips and slowly lower you from behind. If you’re having trouble balancing, lean against the wall or some furniture for support.
Why You Shouldn’t Be Scared: I know you’re worried about falling over, but if you move slowly, you won’t. And you will feel like total sex experts and be able to have sex even when there’s no bed around. So there’s a whole lot to love.
7. In A Chair
How To Do It: One of you sits in a chair, sofa, or whatever you have present. You face away from them and lower yourself down, then grind and bounce away. You can mix it up by facing toward your partner instead.
Why You Shouldn’t Be Scared: If you haven’t had sex on the furniture before, it can be a little daunting. But it’s great for kissing, dirty talk, and playing with your clit and nipples, so it’s literally all happening. Give it a try.
Originally posted on Bustle