If you think getting caught having sex is bad, getting caught having sex by a family member is so, so much worse. But, according to a new survey by the UK’s leading lingerie and erotic retailer Ann Summers, it’s happened to a lot of us. They questioned over 1,000 customers and found out that almost a third of Brits have been in just that pickle — the’ve been caught by family members having sex during this time of year. Talk about holiday cheer.
“Nothing makes sex hotter than adding a bit of risk and a new environment,” an Ann Summers spokesperson said in a press release. “Squeezing in a quickie whilst away with friends and family this Christmas is a great way to spice up your sex life — just be careful where and when you do it, you don’t want to get caught and have the story brought up every year!”
But what I found more interesting than how many people are getting caught is where they are getting caught. Because it’s not where you think. Here’s what the survey found:
1. 43 Percent Were Caught In Somebody Else’s Bedroom
I mean, this sort of makes sense if you’re visiting extended family, because you wouldn’t have your own bedroom. But aren’t most couples going to oneof your parent’s houses? Some people will surely be in their childhood rooms. That may mean having sex on weird Power Rangers sheets, but you don’t need to go into someone else’s room to do it.
2. 40 Percent Were Caught In The Bathroom
Does this make sense? If you’re crashing on the couch and don’t have a private bedroom, maybe. I get that the bathroom can be handy because it’s private, but this isn’t just people having sex in bathroom — 40 percent of those caught were caught in the bathroom. So you’re not only leaving the bathroom door open, you’re leaving the bathroom door open while you’re having sex in it. Come on guys, we can do better.
3. 36 Percent Were Found in Their Parent’s Bedroom
Shut. The. Front. Door. So out of the people who were caught, 36 percent were found in their parent’s bedroom. This one really shocked me. Maybe I just don’t get the transgressive element of having sex in your parent’s room. Maybe it’s because of the risk of horrific awkwardness at the dinner table if you’re caught. But people are doing it — and doing it right in Mom and Dad’s bed.
Having sex at home can be tough, and you may not want to let the holidays go off without a bang just because you’re at your parent’s house. But it doesn’t take much not to get caught, so pick your time wisely and stick to a private space. And, for the love of god, is it that hard to use a lock?
Originally posted on Bustle